Ep. 8 of TFQ’s new podcast: NBA Playoffs & more

Blair Miller > THE SHIT SHOW, Episode 8 & Links

It looks like the last two long weekends – Canada’s Victoria Day was last week, and Memorial Day just ended in the U.S. – have ushered in some summery weather. Finally.

With the hot weather comes a hot-as-fuck Episode 8 of The Shit Show. We recorded it just before last night’s Game 4 between the Heat and the Pacers, and we tried to make the episode shorter since it was a 4-day break since Ep. 7 (we delayed that for the NBA Draft Lottery), but, well, you know. We started blazing, and we just love talking sports that much.

Listen to the podcast here

In What I Saw we detailed a pretty fun Sunday in the MLB. Yorga brought up the Yunel Escobar vs. the Red Sox bench incident, which led to us reminiscing about the time current White Sox manger Robin Ventura once tried to take on Nolan Ryan.

I also slapped a What I Saw at the silly spat Cardinals CB Patrick Peterson and his Seahawks counterpart Richard Sherman, which was started by Peterson’s assertion that Sherman isn’t a shutdown cornerback. (FYI: There are NO shutdown corners anymore.) Here’s a scoop on the start of the spat.

I explain during the podcast, but here’s my tweet response. (I was also stoned, and called him “Patterson” at least once. I regret nothing.)

As always, we did our weekly #PROPS and #DROPS segment, which is partly a recap of our tweets throughout the past week. You can follow The Fifth Quarter @TFQuarter and Yorga at @count_yorga

We gave out an easy #DROPS to Pacers F Lance Stephenson for saying he thought he was getting under Heat F LeBron James’ skin because James was trash talking to him. This was my tweet at the time of the news:

SPOILER ALERT: Soon after this, Yorga comes dangerously close to implying that Stephenson should whack off James prior to Game 4.

SPOILER ALERT 2: That almost certainly didn’t happen before Game 4.

Yorga #PROPS-upped a situation in which a budding minor league baseball star hit his first pro home run…and his father caught the ball.

I gave #PROPS to Heat president Pat Riley for finally being on the verge of cashing in – literally – on his trademarked phrase “3-Peat”, which he first coined in the early 1980s when he was coaching the Lakers, who had won two straight championships. It’s taken until now for Riley to be connected to another possible 3-Peat, so he’s been filing more trademarks for the phrase on shit ranging from jewelry, sports memorabilia and even linens. If you don’t believe me, check this.

Listen to the podcast here

After #PROPS and #DROPS I realized we’d been going for a while, and said that Yorga might have to impersonate me while I made another Gin & Juice, a la Ed Rooney’s secretary, Grace, in Ferris Bueller’s Day Off. Go to 3:14 of this clip to see what I mean.

We also dusted off our segment called Stop The Movie, Start The Madness with a look at the Bill Cosby megaflop Leonard Part 6 because I have nicknamed Spurs F Kawhi Leonard as Leonard Part 2. (After his jersey number.) It was tough sledding,b tu we did it, and gave y’all some fun references that we’ll likely ride into the ground for the rest of the NBA playoffs. Also, we’ve named the segment after this Simpsons episode. For those of you who aren’t up to snuff – or should I say sniff – this is the episode when Homer starts snorting steak like he’s Steaky Montana.

We talked a bit about the movie and how some moments/things could be used for goofy analogies for Kawhi Leonard reference.  (Who we will now refer to as Kawhi Leonard Part 2, after his jersey number.) Our favourite nonsensical part of the film was that part of Leonard’s superspy uniform was this helmet:


I had so many #DROPS during which I got on a soapbox, and then was harsh about Heat F Chris Bosh’s lack of aggressiveness just before Game 4 of the Eastern Conference finals, that I said I was grinding my gears this week, which is a shout-out to this great Family Guy moment.

Our Weekly Woodshed looked at the nice new veranda addition the Spurs put onto their playoff woodshed this season. Here’s the box score.

With that, we head off into the sunset, looking forward to Ep. 9 of The Shit Show. Stay tuned!!

Listen to the podcast here



Ep. 7 of TFQ’s new podcast: NBA Draft Lottery & Playoffs

Blair Miller > THE SHIT SHOW, Episode 7 & Links

Well hello again, sport nuts. We waited a few extra days to record Episode 7 of The Shit Show so that we could talk about the NBA Draft Lottery while it is still fresh. But as usual, we touch on a slew of topics in the sports world.

Listen to the podcast here

In the opening, I say we’re higher than “Webster tied to a balloon”. I can’t take credit for that – it’s from “Outrun”, a People Under The Stairs song.

In our weekly What I Saw segment, I made fun of Panthers DE Greg Hardy for allegedly letting his jealousy for hip-hop “star” Nelly make him lose control.

As always, we gave out our weekly #PROPS and #DROPS – in part a reprise of some tweets we make throughout the week. You can follow us at @TFQuarter & @count_yorga

Here’s that #PROPS article on the NFL and drug restrictions by Ross Tucker. I agree with Tucker, that punishment for marijuana offences should be loosened, and that it should be a sort of leverage for getting HGH testing through.

I also gave predictable #PROPS to Tim Duncan.

Yorga gave props to the walk-out songs for two MLB hitters: Texas’ Prince Fielder’s and Oakland’s Josh Reddick. Which one do you favour?

Reddick’s choice of “Carless Whisper” made me think of an old YouTube video I saw of a guy in a gorilla suit wandering the streets alone to a saxophone solo of the same song. I couldn’t find the damn thing (but you wouldn’t believe the shit that comes up when googling things like “lonely gorilla saxophone”), but here’s another musical gorilla – to Genesis instead of Wham!.

Fielder’s Soul-Glo turn reminded me of my affinity to point out how much NFL QB Jason Campbell looks like Eriq La Salle in TFQ’s What I Saw.

Jason Campbell


Listen to the podcast here

At one point my home phone started ringing during the podcast ( we get real raw on The Shit Show: 1 take, no editing), and I started doing Cameron Fry’s lines from Ferris Bueller’s Day Off: “He’ll keep calling me….” (I don’t get it bang-on, but not bad for off-the-cuff.)

When we touched on the now-finished Spurs-Blazers series, I said that I spouted some pro-Spurs numbers in last week’s The Dr. Is In podcast at Raptors Republic.

I tweeted this criticism of the OKC Thunder, specifically GM Sam Presti’s inability to put perimeter defenders on the roster.

Our Weekly Woodshed was a drubbing Dodgers P Clayton Kershaw sustained from the D’Backs. Here’s the game summary, and the box score.

Lastly, we often watch sports on TV while we record The Shit Show, and though I didn’t catch the actual play and the channel immediately went to another broadcast afterward, I said I thought I saw Tigers bullpen men Al Alburquerque commit a bases-loaded balk in the 13th inning to lose to the Indians. I was right, and since we promised we’d verify it for our listeners, here’s the ESPN game summary.

That’s it for Episode 7!  Be sure to check out my draft analysis for what the Raptors might do with the 20th pick overall in the NBA draft at Raptors Republic, coming out at the end of the week.  Peace out!

Listen to the podcast here

Ep. 6 of TFQ’s new podcast: NFL Draft recap & NBA Playoffs

Blair Miller > THE SHIT SHOW, Episode 6 & Links

Hope all of you are now well recovered from an action-packed sports weekend!

The dust has settled, and now it’s time to reflect with Episode 6 of The Shit Show, TFQ’s weekly podcast!

Listen to the podcast here

This week we focus on some analysis of the NFL Draft, get into the NBA playoffs, and give you most of the usual segments you’ve become used to if you’re a regular listener. (If you’re not, get your head out of your ass.)

As usual, we’ve added links to the Episode 6 podcast. Your hosts, Count Yorga and I (Jerkules), like to make a lot of goofy references, along with statistical sources, so here’s a companion for your listening – and smoking, after all…. – pleasure.

Listen to the podcast here

In the opening to Episode 6, I make an explicit reference to “How High” by Method Man and Redman. It’s oddly difficult the explicit version of the song on the interweb, but here are the ­lyrics.

One of our weekly segments is What I Saw, a current events-type spinoff of the old NFL posts on TFQ. Yorga spoke about Rangers pitcher Yu Darvish’s almost-no-no against the Red Sox last week. Here’s a summary of the game, with some .gifs, and also a YouTube highlight reel of the game.

Every week we do #PROPS and #DROPS, a cheers/jeers segment for the sports world. We often tweet these shout-outs, but add others for the podcast. You can follow us @count_yorga & @TFQuarter

When we gave #DROPS to the Miami Dolphins for their poor job of tweeting during the NFL draft, I called their first round pick, Ju’Wuan James, Juwanna Man.

Another #DROP went to the Cleveland Cavs for hiring (and firing) Mike Brown yet once again. I’ve called the former Spurs assistant Mr. Potato Head ever since he became the head coach of the Cavs the first time. Turns out I’m not alone.

Mike Brown Potato Head

Listen to the podcast here

Yorga had a few baseball-oriented #PROPS and #DROPS, which led us to refer to a few fun things:

Jays infielder Juan Francisco struck out seven times in a row, spanning multiple games. Striking out four times in one game is known as a Golden Sombrero. I proposed the Francisco’s feat be referred to as the Nacho Sombrero, a la Homer Simpson’s treat at the football game he went to with Flanders. (“Na-cho, Na-cho maaan, I want to be a na-cho man!”)

Everyone will agree that Toronto SS Jose Reyes is fast, but who knew he was so fast that he could pull off a Willie Mays Hayes move, scoring from second base on a ball hit to second. Here’s the play. Here’s the Mays Hayes play from Major League.

All that talk about Wesley Snipes led me to wish the thespian would make more of a comeback after prison for tax evasion than just Brooklyn’s Finest. I said, “always bet on black” – a shout-out to the Snipes crapfest that is Passenger 57. What a line; what a delivery by Snipes.

We spent a lot of time dissecting the NFL Draft that went down last weekend. I also call the Vikings head coach Mike “Keys To My Beemer” Zim-Zimmmer. I hope it goes without saying that we don’t shy away from Beenie Man references here at TFQ.

I referred to a nice job of reporting on NFL.com about the situation in the Cowboys war room during the first round. Here it is.

I predicted that LeBron James & Co. would get on the Brooklyn Nets like Solange Knowles got onto Jay-Z in an elevator. (Editors note: Turns out the King went off for a career playoff-high 49 points the night we recorded the podcast.)

When talk turned to the NBA playoffs, wasted little time before milking the infamous You Tube mashup of 10 hours of Dr. Hibbert laughing, in honor of Pacers C Roy Hibbert finally making an impact.

In a show of sympathy for Blazers PG Damien Lillard getting left on Parker Island during his series with the Spurs, we surmised that Lillard might feel as despondent as Karl Malone does in the second year star’s recent Foot Locker commercial.

Listen to the podcast here

That’s it for this week – see y’all next week on The Shit Show!